http://jeffalopolis.com Not Necessarily Useful Information Wed, 24 Aug 2011 18:42:19 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 http://jeffalopolis.com/otaku-life-coach/ http://jeffalopolis.com/otaku-life-coach/#comments Thu, 28 May 2009 02:03:41 +0000 jeffalopolis http://jeffalopolis.com/?p=17 Continue reading →]]> The phenomenon of life coaches is something fairly new to the world and most of these people tend to lurk on the internet, waiting to spring at the chance to help you gain money, friends, and overall happiness.  What if you already have a lot of money and you’re tired of spending night after night drinking in the club with friends?  What if you have bookshelves that are covered with books instead of manga and anime figures?  What you need is an Otaku Life Coach.  So here is a collection of my hints on how to be an Otaku:

• women like to know you aren’t afraid of commitment; prove you aren’t by collecting every Haruhi figure
• Required watching (anime) Tenchi Muyo, Trigun, Cowboy Bebop, Evangelion, Nadesico, Love Hina, Last Exile
• Required watching (dorama) Great Teacher Onizuka, Hanazakari no Kimi Tachi E, Nobuta wo Produce, Waters Boys 1 & 2, Proposal Daisakusen, Shikaotoko Aoniyoshi
• having lots of friends is hard; email them all pics of you with an anime figure; those still talking to you are keepers
• conference calls are boring; add “-nya” to the end of everything you say during them
• talking to coworkers can get tiring; steer every conversation to Evangelion and soon they won’t talk to you
• playgrounds in Japan are for more than children playing; they are for lovesick teenagers.  Be sure to pick the type of equipment to loiter on based on your mood.  If you’re depressed, go for the swings; if you’re thoughtful, you need to hang out at the top of the slide; and if you’re feeling like impressing the ladies, do something on the monkey bars.

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